Friday 12 March 2010

Memory Lane






We not only live a mobile life, we try to live as minimalist a life as we can, so I've been scanning in the scads of hard-copy photographs that we own, so they are digitally stored (and take up less space) and the originals can be given into the care of my children, who are not so enamoured of the mobile/minimal life!

This process has, of course, resulted in many trips down Memory Lane, which could have been seen as time-wasting, but which I've found to be deeply positive and affirming. As we go through life, it's all too easy to stand in judgement on oneself, specially if others express their dissatisfaction with you! I have finally realised that storing up other peoples' assessments of you in an archive of judgement is the road to madness and depression, not to mention a life that is wasted! Any mother will tell you that you're on a hiding to nothing - everyone, parent or child, could do it much better than you! This archiving process has given me a new perspective on my own mothering.

The 'static' between myself and my children has sometimes led me into believing that I was the worst mother in the history of mankind (no, I'm not exaggerating) and I half expected, despite the wisdom of hindsight, to find many pictures of sad, lost-looking children. Instead I found a treasure-trove of laughter and joy, pictures of giggling faces, families fooling around on the beach, picnicking in parks and generally enjoying life together.

I found, too, reminders of how beautiful my children always were, how they all have a family resemblance in one way or another, and they have handed down the generations. All of us have a resemblance as tiny children, and 2 of my daughters have grown to look remarkably like my sister as they have grown into women, while my son and middle daughter have retained the 'Black Welsh' look that I have (my father's family came from a farm near Lampeter)

I have still only scanned in about half of our store of photographs, which date back, in some cases, to the early years of the 20th century, so I still have many adventures in Memory Lane to look forward to!

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